We all know that it is in one's highest good to grieve the loss of a relationship. Healthy grief releases feelings rather than allowing them to get stuck in the body. Healthy grief allows the griever to heal the loss and move on with life.

Yet grief is not always healing. Many of us have known people who were stuck in their grief, seemingly locked into the past and unable to move forward in their lives.

What is the difference between those who feel their grief and move on and those who get stuck in it? The difference lies in what they believe they have lost. When people believe they have lost their source of love, their grief will feel unending.

Gary had been in a three-year relationship with Samantha when Samantha decided to end the relationship. Gary was devastated. In this relationship, like in his past relationships, Gary was a taker - always trying to get love but unable to give love or share love. Samantha gave him a lot of love, but she often felt very lonely with him. Gary was devastated when she left because his source of love was gone. He was not grieving the loss of Samantha as a person he loved. He was grieving the loss of her love for him. He was grieving as a lost wounded child rather than as a loving adult.

As a result, Gary became stuck in his grief. He was stuck in feeling like a victim - stuck in "poor me." Gary had never done the inner work to develop an adult part of himself that could bring love to himself and share it with others. He felt lost, abandoned, and hurt. No matter how much he cried, no healing occurred. Because he was abandoning himself, he just continued to feel alone and despairing. Sometimes he was angry at Samantha for abandoning him and other times he was angry at himself for not being a better partner. He had many regrets that plagued him, and a constant inner refrain was, "If only I had..." "If only I had listened to her more, maybe she wouldn't have left." If only I had told her how beautiful she is, maybe she wouldn't have left."

Frank, on the other hand, was in deep grief over the death of his beloved wife, Beth. He had loved Beth with his whole heart and he missed her terribly. Yet Frank's grief was totally different than Gary's grief. Frank missed Beth's laugh. He missed her joy, her caring for people, her sense of wonder. He missed her as a person, and he missed being able to share his love with her. Frank had no regrets because he had not been a taker. He had loved Beth totally and was deeply grateful for the time he had with her. But Frank was actually fine. His grief came in waves, and he cried when it came. Then it washed through and he was fine again.

Frank was fine because Beth had not been the source of his sense of self. Frank had a strong loving inner adult who was connected with a spiritual source of love and wisdom. This was his Source, not Beth. Frank was a person who took full responsibility for his own pain and joy. He had never made Beth responsible for his feelings or his well-being.

Because he had never abandoned himself, he could miss Beth and grieve for her without feeling abandoned, lost, victimized and alone.

Gary, on the other hand, was not fine, no matter how much sadness he released, because Samantha had been his Source of love, his Higher Power. He had handed to her the job of defining his sense of self, so when she left, all he could feel was abandoned. Gary had handed his Inner Child - his feeling self - to Samantha. He had made Samantha responsible for his feelings, so when she left, he felt like an abandoned child. His Source of love had gone away.

Because Frank knew how to love himself, he knew how to love others. Within a couple of years, Frank was in another loving relationship.

Gary found another relationship within six months of losing Samantha, and six months after that was again alone. Until Gary decides to learn to take responsibility for his own feelings and needs, he will likely continue to lose relationship after relationship, and continue to be stuck in feeling like a victim of the women in his life.

Many people attempt to become amateur magicians as a way of entertaining family and friends. If someone wants to become a good magician, it would be helpful to know the different varieties of magic tricks before performing them.

The first type that most people are familiar with is stage magic. This is the most difficult type of magic trick and is often associated with famous magicians such as David Copperfield, Lance Burton, and David Blaine. These types of magic tricks require a great deal of skill to perform and usually involve grand schemes like making a large landmark disappear or walking through walls.

Read More

There is a whole list of foods that cause the body to be over-acidic: dairy and dairy substitutes, animal meat, most grains, chickpeas, condiments, aspartame, prunes, chocolate, peanuts, alcohol and quite a few other types of foods.

To balance your PH, the remedy is simple and logical; eat more alkaline causing foods. To name but a few of these foods, there is; watermelon, lime, mango, most vegetables, vegetable juices, almonds, sprouts, avocados and green tea.

Read More

Traditionally, you would have to save a little each month for years to get enough to live on while you start your business. Another way to do it would be to work for someone else in the same business you want to start. You can learn the ropes while still earning a paycheck. When it's time to quit and begin your business, you'll be miles ahead.

Read More